The Bishop of Calimport

[Random_White_Guy]

A copy is left next to "The Performances of Samuel T. Davidson"

[size=8][tface=salt][tface=fraktur]T[/tface]he [tface=fraktur]B[/tface]ishop

 [tface=fraktur]O[/tface]f [tface=fraktur]C[/tface]alimport[/size]

Commissioned By Samuel T. Davidson

[hide= verse 1]If there were ever a diamond in the rough,
A shiner's warden would be close enough,
fending the scourges tall and short.

The patron saint of shoes,
for wherever an urchin goes,
he glides with a mirthful snort

Twenty Years and one day,
Ever did the children pray,
To the Shiner's "Bishop of Calimport",[/hide][hide=Verse 2]Yet as with many awaited Locke,
From the portal do all beings walk,
Papers of Mistlocke they assume

Business she did bring,
A thousand gold to sling,
"Success!" her employers presume

For in less than a fortnight,
She put up oh such fight,
A thousand coins she did consume[/hide][hide=Verse 3]Be she a cunt?
This little runt?
Some would once dare say so,

Yet if they asked this day,
They would have to say,
"OH BY THE NINE NO!"

A gem of the square,
With beautiful hair,
Suitors wherever she go.[/hide][hide=Verse 4]Standing three foot nil,
Top stacks of gold by the hill,
Never weary of a fight!

Pishaw. One Lycanthrope?,
Six more with shoe-rope,
All slain in one night!

Yours she could be,
Fit for whatever task you see,
If the price is right![/hide][hide=Verse 5]
Yet I hazard a woe,
For any who step a toe,
Across her moral bounds!

Beat a woman raw?
Taking things by the all?
She shall release the hounds!

Bullets of vengeance,
Spraying like tangents,
Dropping you without a sound![/hide][hide=Verse 6]But now you ask-
What of the children's task?!
To save them from lives so sour?

Never forgetting,
Never omitting,
The debt which she must overpower

For the children of the ALLEY!
The Bishop shall Rally!
60,342 coins to devour.[/hide][hide=verse 7]And so she does fight,
For that which is right,
Monsters in the mists!

The Aberrant king slain,
His power did wane,
'Neath her mighty Fists!

"Why fight? Join me as Abberant queen?"
"'Cause You reek like an oxen-spleen!"
"'sides, the children'd be pissed!"[/hide][hide=Verse 8] In a spit of blind rage,
His prized Assassin engaged,
Calimport's Bishop most prized

The fight was so quick,
Her movements so slick,
A veritable dervish, pint-sized

She deftly evaded,
And his grave spaded,
With a chuckling guise[/hide][hide=Verse 9]Alas, no rest for the wicked,
Especially when pockets grow thicked,
Another challenge in pursuit.

The foul depths of the sea,
The Bishop did be,
With a Medusa snake-hirsute.

Alas she was foiled,
As snakes were toiled,
And victory absolute![/hide][hide=Verse 10]  Yet at times one must wonder,
Is it sheer blunder?
Or are all of her endeavors planned?

For certain I cannot say,
No secret can I give away,
But her hijinks I have seen firsthand!

With a friend seeking reprieve,
Away from those who deceive,
Assassins kept her life from bland![/hide][hide=Verse 11]Yet despite these feats,
Hero or villain,
There are countless debates

Did she slay Serisa for rings?
Or merely baseless stings?
But listen not to what gossip states:

For she takes all life will dish up!
To the children she is the Bishop!
AND FOR HARRIET THISTLESPIKE CALIMPORT AWAITS![/hide][/tface]