Journal of Jerrod Felch

[Blue41]

There was a world where the Sagebrush property didn't end up burned to a crisp, where we got what we needed and went our separate ways, relationships intact. But that world ceased to be once she said the words...'it's just another job to me.' Seventy lives claimed, if Sy'laa is to be believed-- and I do-- for a sack of dinar, paid out by the Fourth Legion. Some of them may have been guilty of their crimes, some innocent, but at the word of some paid official under the Sultan's thumb, they're all worthy of death or bondage according to the daughter of a Kulamet preacher.

I couldn't accept that. So we didn't get that more peaceful world, and we ended up in this one, with Meadow hollering for vengeance when she's not cowering in the Krak, awaiting her own trial. And me, declared as a 'ganganeer' and 'Jerrod Gutterbandit' by fools who are finally given the opportunity to paint me as they like. But then, this was a long time coming. Walking in both worlds was never going to be allowed forever. And I've seen enough of their Well to know what won't change, and what I cannot do there.

I'll hold onto the Lily badge, I suppose. Memento and reminder, of the limits of those who tried to do things their way. Guivarch, returned to his worms. Ymir, slapped down at every attempt at independent action. Remembering people is important. No one's allowed to be declared a nobody, not in Kula's garden.