Juniors and seniors alike often ask me how to be manly.
Ferret they'd ask, "How come you're so manly; is it skill, is it nature, please tell me!"
"Ferret, is it true that you can spend the night with three women? Hells, last I heard you even had four! One of them a Barkely!?"
"Nobody drinks like Finney's boy, he must have a gullet of stone, a god among man to be sure."
Well my starry-eyed readers of wonder, here are the facts:
You ain't born tough, you become it, got to earn it all, they say. 'Cause being Callaghan Finney's son is a treat on its own, ain't seen a bare-knuckled fight if you ain't seen Callaghan rip someone to shreds. Early life for me was a nursery rhyme, the good life. Raised by whores and running for shimmer, it's a win/win really, coin and indulgences of the worse kind. Makes one grow hair, I say.
That all said, you need to get yourself some female while your growing, or you'll turn out queer like Hastian, who being the shit-smear he is only rolls with the half grade prissy types. Remember this one readers, for it is a definite.
Fighting, can't do shit without fighting. Only helps if you take beating after beating, all the better if you nearly join the gods because of it. Loss of blood makes you young as well, so if you're some fretty little bitch who only cares about your looks, fret not.
Family, don't never forget about your family, unless you have a tragic looking bastard for a brother, who would then be made into some type of pet. See family as a gift and make sure you get yourself a harlot that is near up for anything and too scared to be tussling in the sheets with others. Mind you she has to clearly understand you are a sower of the earth and it's your right to bed who you like if she's giving you too much lip or emotional grief. Love your dad and love your mums.
No rotheshit jewelry. Real man don't have piercings and shaved chests, they sure as shit don't go and get themselves doll'd up by some random willing to draw on them. I swear to you kids reading this here tome of information, you do that and you are dead to me; dead to your hero.
Drink nightly when you can and how you can until you can't drink no more. Man drink and they are good at it. Heightens the senses and restores the brain I hear them say. Incidentally the shit is good for the soul; all heroes indulge in the drink.
Don't hesitate; axe, sword, flail, dagger, scythe, sickle and hammer away if you have to. Pausing will get you chopped up then chopped some more until you're either red as the day you were born or straight dead. Men take charge always.
Be like Finney, be a man.
Finney the Ferret