Looking out of the shores of Evermeet. Wondering what's out there. I have long been subject to the foolishness that our poeple hold towards the other "lesser" races. Frankly, I think it's all lies. Calling ALL humans unkept, dirty short-lives, calling all dwarves dritys, cave-crawlers and so on.

I find it amazing the amount of teasing the half elves endure here, though there are only one or two, and they will only live a fraction of what the "pure" elves will, don't they ths deserve our care and compassion, not our teasing and taunts!?

I know, one day, I'll leave this island and see all the world before me. One day.

-Nym Elglass.

*after about thirty meaningless entries this is the only one of slight interest. The others seem to be pointless facts about how much Nym hates the world.*

Oh, what trials I have had to endure on this damnably confined island! But, it's all going to be over soon. Tomorrow is my accention into adulthood (I still don't know what name I'll take) and two days from now I'll be on a boat into human lands.

*After two or three entries about being confined further on the boat you find:*

So finaly, this is it. It seems a somewhat wild land, they droped me (at my request) away from any cities and thus on a beach with no docks. Life seems to be a beach. Well, i have set of toward where the sun sets; west, and have had no luck on fining and civilizations, just passing travelers.

I again have found something to both further and cripple my belifes about humans:

My third day traveling the road i was attacked by five rugged-looking humans and robbed. They left me on the road to bleed or starve to death, surely i couldn't have moved much. However, a day or so after i was attacked, after seeing a priest of the human god Tyr and a monk of Kelemvor stroll idly past without a second thought, a paladin came, he wore a symbol of Torm, and though he was human (my impression of humans isnt extrodinary thus far) he took the time to dress my wounds and he place me atop his horse, he then took me to someplace I'll never foget; the fortress.

*he added this after an hour or so, after being interupted.*

The fortress, a wounderouse place, it is on the farthest reaches of the city Waterdeep's territory. It is occupied mainly be paladins andwould-be paladin aspirants. though there are few priests here, one or two of the older human paladins have retired their blade and shield to settle into a life of preaching to coninue the religion of the fortress. I have found that only three gods are worshiped here; Torm, Tyr and Ilmater, known as the Triad, and i have found myself woundering, though i never chose a deity back in Evermeet, i had thought the elven gods and goddesses the only faiths, now i see i was wrong. I have fell slightly to the ways of the Triad. I truely am enjoying it here, though i mostly stay among the aspirants, the young humans always seem begging for me to show them how to fight, though i only know how to in one to one combat, i always show them. My wounds are almost healed from the ambush on the road and i plan to be leaving soon.

-Nalarolm (formerly Nym) Elglass

Ah, how quickly plans can change! I know now that i'm not going anywhere. I'm to stay here and continue my studies as a paladin, i am now an aspirant of the order of the Triad Fortress. Though i have seen one of my own kin here i know that my kind will be rare. Before coming here i never heard of such a thing as a elven paladin (i'd never heard of such a thing as a paadin itself) nor had i heard of the Triad, yet now here i am. They converted me in less then two weeks, damn their skilled...

-Nalarolm Elglass

*more then fifty entries have been made, mostly about the Triad and training, even metioning a female human paladin Nym seems to like, she is refered to as Talia at first, then Tali. And a son Tali left Nym when she was younger; Samiil.*

One hundred years. One hundred years. No matter how many times i say it, it still feels so alien. One hundred years.

I have outlived everyone else, even Tali. Samiil is going well as a priest, after having hung his blade. One hundred years. And probably have many more to go, from the way i've seen Samiil age i know i'll outlive him, and it brings me endless pain to know that i'll be atending my own son's funeral.

As the fact that i am the oldest surviving memeber i was thus entitled to take the rank as ElderMaster of the order, but considering samiil's fast ageing and the fact that i am only two hundred summers, far from elder, i have handed it to him and remaind to train aspirants with the blade and shield.

A pair of moon elves aproched the Fortress seeking aid; some of their children had been taken in a drow raid. Samiil was quick to send half of the current members, myself included (at my request). We were defeated, my brothers fell and i was taken a slave to "care" for the moon elven children. We are planing our escape for the next time the drow sleep.

Finaly, freedom.

I failed to save anyone, all those years ago. something tells me it was another hundred, for not long ago i felt an uncontrolable sorrow for Samiil. I know he has died. And i am now a free man, in the wilds of the underdark, that only means your free to die without the fear of a whip at your heels. And so it goes. I walk the caves, praying to Torm, Tyr and Ilmater for salvation, yet all i receve is more walking. I have no fear, i know that if i die i will be with Tali and Samiil, though i am not about to plunge onto m own blade eather, if theres a chance i can see Samiil's grave then i'll be one to take it.

*it seem he walked on for many hours before writing:*

Praise to the Triad, i've found my salvation in the form of a city!

They tell me it's called, Sanctuary.

I have met few here and i am starting to loose my ability to belive what my sense tells me.

The dark auras here are amazing! So much evil. I have encountered one thing that shocks me, even though its sacreligiouse to Torms ways; Stoning, the execution placed for traitors, and though Torm asks quick and painful death to traitors, thats where my faith the Ilmater comes in. Mercy and duty, the two conflicting forces so common in a paladin, or at least from my experience, duty almost always wins.

However, in a small excursion to battle trogs (underdark lizadmen) my mercy won a small battle. We had fought our way through when one lizardman surrendered and asked that we did not kill it's eggs. Of corse, my first impulse was to cut the thing down, but then i saw it though a different perspective, the trogs wished onyl to protect their children and had done nothing wrong. So i convinced my party to spare the poor thing. Though when we went to leave we found a sleeping guard-trog. Aided by a half orcish (a rare mix) compainion we felled the beast while the others had been disacted in exiting the cave. Duty prevailed over mercy. And in the end, through my own eyes, i was justified, i saved the only thing i honestly felt compassion for; their children, by letting the own live, and if only one lived, their next generation would be slower to come, so any danger of a trog attack was ended. however i can not help but feel guilt.

Almost a week later Sanctuary suffer threat from the hells themselves. I went with one of the elven women i had met earlyer, Leveleia, to investigate a rumor we had heard from a rather odd human. We went through a gate into what i think was the hells itself. We were encountered by a large, imposing red dragon. And a half demonic (very rare mixing) called a thiefling, i belive, went naked up to it and was alowing itself to be eaten, though the dragon had the pressing matter of what to do with the rest of it's meal, me and the others in the group. Though the group was all evil save for two other elves, a seeker and Leveleia, and i would have happily left them all (except the seeker and Leveleia) to be devoured by the dragon, i did not abandon until i witnessed both my kin felled by the dragon. Knowing there was nothing i can do, and that my tounge-flapping would not save any, i simply walked away. Hoping that the damnable dragon never gets free.

I have accomplished one small goal: Joining the Order of the Penitant Heart. Funny, i was an aspirant of another order just two hundred years ago, now im an aspirant again. In yet another human order. I have met with only two members of the order thus far, and i know little, if not nothing about both of them. A counciler leads the order, so my dispise for titles is going to be pushed. Well, at least i have others to stand with against the overwelming darkness. If this is as interesting as just two hundred years have been then i can not wait to see the next hundred or so. Yet i HAVE lernt that each day is as important as a millenium by living with humans for most of my life. Odd, i never really thought much of a difference existed between the races, humans don't live as long, not a massive difference considering most die in battles anyway, but now i finaly see it. It's the respect humans have for those "above" them. I have always clung to my belife of even treatment, yet after seeing the difference in actions concering "superiors" and "equals" i think i see it. Superiors have, physicly and socialy, more power then their "underlings" whereas, an "equal" has exactly the same power as you do, and thus can take less from you then a "superior".

Though i have always been Nym to friends, i think i shall allow those thinking themselves better then others call me by my damnable true name.

Also, i have been unable to think of this place as a home. As i couldnt with the island, my homeland, and strangly, i have the same feelings toward this place as i had to the Drow house i was slaved to. Sanctuary, with it's spewing evil and seething corruption, is not the place i belong. i came so far, but in the end it doesnt seem to matter, i guess i have to fall, and loose it all, to apreciate anything. I have less love for the wilds then i have for these damnable walls. I'll just have to put my trust in Torm, i guess thats as far as i can go given the condition i find my self in. I am little more then a slave here, forced to kill things like trogs for gold, it is not the way i wish to live. Though the Order of the Penitant Heart is trying to remove the corruption, it even has it's Grand Master in the position of counciler, but i fear as long as there are evil people in Sanctuary it will never be safe, it will always have corruption in the very forces we've trusted our lives to. I see lower sanctuary's reason for rebelling now, and i agree with their reasoning. They seem to wish the Spellguard dissassembled.

The spellguard. They seem overpowered in ever way, though they do have the a abillity to protect us against thralls of Mind Flyars, they seem to aid in destroying the town from the inside out. They are all powerful wizards, though. And Torm has shown me their aura's they're not evil, though may be individualy. And so i am forced to remain inactive.

Yesterday i tried to join the Beacon. She didn't tell me if i was hired though. While me and another elf were talking to her a woman ran into the Beacon screaming for help. We asked her what was wrong and she told us some renigade Animatrons had broken through her floor and attacked her and her husband. We rallied a small force, and once again desperation forced me to work alongside evil. We did indeed save her husband, then the group i was with decided to go down the tunnel that the animatrons came through, i had no problems with this, in fact, i wanted to go down. But they didn't stop to orginise tactics, they just jumped down the hole. So we fought our way through the animatrons. Then the group found a box, and stupid as it sounds, we spent half of an out trying to get the damn thing open! We had one of our compainons walk strait into traps i had TOLD them was THERE, he died and i can't say im overly sorry, but he was revived, and eventualy we got the box open and it was about time when it happened. We continued to fight through the metal until we came up into the sewers. Then we had to fight through the rats just to get as close to the "surface" as we could. I guess we did save the couple but they must remain in the beacon until their home is repaired.

Gods, i thought this city was safe! I'll be staying out of lower when sleeping, lest a animatron destroys the Crone.

What a week. i havent even been able to write in here, i've been so bottled up with my own worrys. Well, i guess i found a way to help the beacon. I am planing events for it, at the moent i'm working on a fund raising dueling tornament. And i've ask the order i joined, the Order of the Penitent Heart, to become involved. And if they don't, i'm leaving the order so i'll have more time to help the Beacon. You see, i've actualy SEEN the Beacon helping people which is much more then i can say for the Order. If i wanted to become part of an inactive faction with good intentions then i would have joined the watch.

As far as i can see it, the Order is well on it's way to total inactivity, being led by a counciler and having the other high rank filled by a counciler. I honestly have no concern for their bussiness, in fact, i've only ever met three members of it; the Grand Master, another aspitant, and counciler Shane. And in the time i saw them, Shane had followed me to take up a challenge that was offered by a rather powerful human fighter, the Grand Master was completely inactive and clamed to be busy, and the other aspirant, from what i've seen, places too much respect in her superiors and has no time for those of equal rank. Honestly, i am considering weather i made a mistake in joining the order, and be damned if i'm going to sit as idle as them.