I am Harley, and somehow, between the studies im going to find a way to keep this journal. As a few-mounth-old child i was abandoned on the steps of a fortress dedicated to Tyr, even handed god of justice, unable to find parents that wouldnt give up and sell me into slavery or possible parents with good auras, the paladins decided to raise me into their order.

My first oath was one i took lightly, maybe too lightly, i didnt realise that after it there would be no turning back on the Path. Though i am still studying i feel my path remains unclear, all Waterdeep will not listen to a paladin of my age, so i am forbidden to leave the fortress, besides, my view of justice is aparently 'tainted by sympathy'.

The fortress was aproched by two elves, a man and a woman, seeking our aid, Kelbelm, the paladin with the most active roll as my father, decided he was going to go on this quest and extended the offer to me as his ward.

Aparently, the elves were raided by their darker cousins; the drow, the dark elves took several of the moon elven children eather for tourture or slavery and left the older elves too weak to go on their own, thus the aid of the fortress was sought.

*this page and two pages after it seem to splashed with blood, thw wrighter's blood*

Disaster! Kelbelm was struck down by the vile, black-skined elves and i was taken with them, most likly to be tourtured for amusment. I have written this journal while the fiends slept, it seems in their imperfection they can not watchs their prisoners all the time, this gives me and the surviving children a chance at escape.

It seems down here disasters come in pairs, i tried to escape with the children buit one of the guards awoke and saw us running, there were just three children and me left alive, it seems the priestess drow was sacrificing them so i could not wait any longer.

While we were running the drow seemed to create a darkness infront of us that was even darker then the underdark itself, the children refused to go through it. So i took up a large stone and we waited for what i was certian was death, the elven children hiding behind me and the armed and aromored drow moving ever closer. I am not entirly sure what happened, i blacked out and when i woke up i was in the wilds of the underdark, the children and the drow were nowhere to be seen, all i had was this book and rags on my back.

I must continue the quest for Kelbelm, and for Tyr himself.

After wondering the underdark i have found a strange thing, large gates, much different from the ones back at the frotress, guarded by armored people of about human hight. I went and asked entry and they alowed me in, it seems those walls were just to protect some stairs, i hurryed down the stairs and saw a amazing thing: a city far from human design yet there are beings from all races living in it. I hurryed into the nearest building which aparently was a inn called the Rock Bottom, a inronic name considering it's location.

I was in there for almost five minits when a ill looking halfling came in, he was wearing a odd looking beaked helm, as was everyone else, he told me that he has the 'plauge' and that i should keep a distance from him, but i, as are most paladins, am pritected by my diety. In my view, Tyr the even handed should protect the entire city, thus the scales would balance, or there is the possibility he protects the paladins to aid the ill.

I realise that there is no way i can save the children now, but i can aid in avenging them. I am forced to continue my studies in this cave-city and find the surface before i age another year in order to take my final test. I have left a small anouncment in the Rock Bottom asking anyone who can teach me the ways of Tyr to send me a letter, my hopes are not that high though. Also, there are a group of law keepers in this city called the Watch, i would look into joining them if not for my age, there are also another group called the Civil Defence League, perhaps i can attempt to join them.

It ahs been weeks since my last entry and i do not know why i havent found the time. Studies pile on studies and i know i must take the oath down here. Though i disagree with what i am being forced by my upbringing to belive, *the next few words have been wrigten by a forced hand, a sign of fustration* NO MATTER WHAT I DO OR HOW HARD I STUDY I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. There is a place here, however, called the House Of Light, while i have never been in there i am seriously condiering joining them, from what i have been told before they were taken by a group for lower (the scum-pit of injustice) they helped many, not caring if they were lawful or unlawful, they helped according to needs, like what i belive in, though it is sacreligious to the god i follow, i care by needs, not criminal records.

After wrighting this and finnishing my fourth book of studies i have been given time to think. i am going to wright a letter asking if i may aid.

I wrote the letter to the House of Light and got a reply saying i should meet with one of it's members. My studies have been rewarding and i truely belive i am ready. I'm ready to help Sanctuary, ready to take the oath. Ready to end the studies. Yet i find myself... nerviouse. If i do this then i will have so much more time to contribute to helping everyone i can, yet still, i disagree with the punishments here. The primary one seems to be stoning, the accused is chained in a cage and the community participates in trowing stones at him until he dies. I have always hated the penelty of death, for if we use it then what makes us better then the accused? True, there are prisons here, yet i find myself also disagreeing with the enforcers of law here, the watchmen. They go through no process of questioning and just arrest people who have been accused, then fine them. Also, exile seems popular here, we are in the Underdark so exile may be worse then death, being forced into homelessness in these damnable caves... I am not going to think i can ever make a difference, this city is beyond the aid of a single person. And after seeing a flyer reading something about vampires, i know it's going to need my help anyway to defend it, along with every other able-bodied citizen.

Everyone has there problems, everone says the same things; it's just a matter how you solve them. I feel i now know how quickly life can change, yet i can not change the lives of those who have fallen to ways of evil, which seems to be most down here... Every action has it's conciquence, yet if the ends justifys the means then should the conciquence be bad? If someone has endangered the city, should he really be stoned for it? Sure he has suffered enough, yet being given death in such a way is hard for me to belive. Maybe thats where the exile sentence shuld be used?

I am thinking things like this after seven hours of study. Not a good sign.

It's been a long week. A long, hard, tiring, consuming, difficult, painful, annoying week. Firstly, the leader of the watch was executed, i could feel the aura from down there from my room in the rock bottom. Then i found the wife of the leader of the house of Light, May Silas, she gave me armor and told me in my hands it may halp me do some good for the city. Fat chance. Maybe if i actualy HAD power to begin with i could help show the darkness here the way of light before others cut them down just for mistakes they have made in their lives. I don't care anymore. No matter how hard i try, i can't seem to do anything, i still follow Tyr and i continue to study in his ways but i stil find myself defeated by them, is a blind blade of law how i truly want to be? A fool following orders from a bigger fool?

Then i found what i pray is the answer; The Order of the Pentient Heart. From what i have been told it's a order of paladins, priests, monks and any good hearted warrior that follow the triad. I saught out Loen Belmont, the order's leader. I told him i would be interested in joining the order and he took me to the grotto. He made me swear (another!) oath, this time to the order, not Tyr, and made ma an aspirant. THough i have only joined a few days ago i still find myself beliving; this is it, this is what i have been waiting for. My chance. My chancenot only to learn and take my final oath but my chance to make a change. I have already found how easaly life can be changed, and i honestly have to intention of changing people against their will but if i can just try to make others see the light of the Way again. Maybe. Just maybe, i will be able to put my past behind me.

It's been a while. A mounth and more.

I got myself into the Order of the Penitant Heart, then i left because of something personal i had to do, that i wont write for fear of the finder of this book after my time has passed judging me. Lower Sanctuary has rebelled and divided from Upper. The House of Light found new ownership in one Vibernum Blackhaw, i saw her name on a notice outside the "Beacon". Upper Sanctuary stripped the rights of a citizen from those who were born into the "slaver races". I sent a letter to the Upper Council, debating my argument against the action, only to get a letter back calling me a moron and shiting all over my belifes. Maybe i should be a blind sword like all the sworn-paladins seem to be and just smite all those who are evil on sight, or maybe i should continue to cling to the belifes i held so dear before falling to the trap of those damnable drow.

Yet, after all the drow did, i do not hate them. It is wrong to hate an entire race for the actions of the majority, Kelbelm told me so, it seems so long ago...

The fortress, Kelbelm, all the others, they're all so distant now. Watching the sun setting on that cliff overlooking the ocean. I crave for those simple times, i wish to forget, yet remember all at the same time. Forget the pain. Remember the joy. It's that simple i guess, yet it feels so complicated.

I'll have to think about this.